We all have triggers. Sometimes I feel upset when I’m being misunderstood, for example. And because I’ve done a lot of healing, I can (usually 😉 respond instead of reacting. I can feel curious and compassionate instead of taking it personally and make requests/boundaries that honor myself and others to create more closeness and love.
Healing = wholeness and access to all of our wisdom and resourcefulness.
What gets us into trouble in relationships is when we get triggered, we react and push the other person away or start an argument. We want to be able to say our feelings and desires but instead we blow up or withdraw. It happens so quickly; it’s like the words slip out of our mouth almost in slow motion, like we’re possessed.
There are specific strategies that you can use to heal triggers so you have access to love, wisdom, and resourcefulness instead of going into fight or flight. Our habits are changeable and it’s possible to feel compassion and curiosity instead. Or if we are triggered, we can act in a way that draws our partner closer so we can transform triggers into deeper connection.
Helena Hart recently interviewed me about how to heal from emotional triggers and wounds so you can finally have the love you want.
I share many tools in this video:
I’d love for you to watch and leave a comment or question. We love hearing from you!
Warmly,
Valerie
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